In spending time with my son there have
been plenty of things that have caused me angst as a parent. However, there is
plenty that has left me laughing very hard at the same time. Being a male, who
is now only beginning to grow up, toilet humour is one that always brings a
smile to the face. I love reading my son’s favourite story The Pirate who had to Pee as much as loves listening to it!
Which brings me to the somewhat humourous
toilet training issue that has plagued us the past few days. In our first week
together I wasn’t sure what to do when I went to the toilet. Should I just
leave H playing? Should I take him with me? Should I shut the door? Now these
are questions that are simple, probably don’t need to asked (or shared) but are
none the less (I have discovered) very important ones. What do you do with your
crawling, very mobile son while you go to the bathroom?
My first discovery of this issue came when
we returned from our swimming lesson. I’d changed him at the pool but came home
in my wet swimmers and towel. Arriving home, wet gear still on, having had a
half hour swimming lesson etc etc my keys hit the lock and I needed to go to
the bathroom. I put H down with his toys and raced to the toilet leaving the
door open behind me. Within seconds I heard the slap, slap, slap of his hands
as he crawled around the corner. He let out a huge “Ooowwwwwwwww” and he
charged into the bathroom behind me.
“No, H, No!” I implored to no avail.
His hands grabbed onto the back of my legs,
taking a handful of hair and twisting on the way up for good measure. Hit,
stick and squeeze! The shoulder contacted the back of my knee in a perfect
tackle with just enough leg drive up to buckle the knee and cause plenty of
wobbling.
Finally, the few seconds (it actually felt
like hours), were over and I could turn around while repeatedly telling H “No!”
In the days since he has become fixated with the toilet, climbing up to hold
onto the bowl and then trying to stick his hands in as far as they can go.
Since his hair tweaking, crash tackling
toilet escapades I have tried several methods to stop him joining me and repeating
the incident. Door shut equals screaming while toys and books equal a momentary
distraction and a chance for him to develop his side step and swerve while
racing forward. What do I do? I am sure I’m not the first person to be crash tackled
from behind by an infant in the toilet. Are there any Dads out there (this is probably
not a problem Mums can help with) who have any advice on how to toilet train my
son from tackling his me into the toilet?
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